The Dread Lich Draxxus Bombastus

From Disposable Heroes
Revision as of 15:24, 16 March 2020 by (talk)
(diff) ← Older revision | Latest revision (diff) | Newer revision → (diff)
Jump to navigation Jump to search

Draxxus Bombastus (Known as The Dread Lich, Draxxus Baby, Hella Bones and many other names) is a Lich and head of Draxxus Industries in the city of Neo-Francisco.

Draxxus's origins are muddled by The Fold, but in his best selling autobiography (Welcome To The Bone Zone: A Lich's Story), Draxxus states that he was born to a common family, and his life pre-lichdom was unremarkable. His Lichdom occurred during The Fold and was the first officially recognized sketification in The Blighted Lands. After attaining Lichhood, Draxxus became a prominent figure in the city, attempting to take it over several times in the following decade. After his public defeat in 2187A, Draxxus retired from villinary to pursue his private interests, magic, and managing his multi quadrillion double dollar app, Bonr.

Pre-Lich Life

Attempts to uncover details about Draxxus's early life have been fruitless, in part due to the chaos left by The Fold, in part due to Draxxus's own successful endeavours to destroy records of his life before he became a Lich. As such, many basic details, such as his age, his original nationality, and his family history, are simply unknown. What little information is available comes largely from Draxxus's self published best selling autobiography, Welcome To The Bone Zone. In the book, Draxxus states that his childhood and human life were fairly unremarkable. He was born to a working class family in what was then known as Canada. He studied journalism and business in school, and spent much of his time developing a promising career in writing after he graduated. According to Draxxus, he doesn't remember the Fold, or his Lichification.

While Draxxus insists his pre-Lich life was unremarkable, he also claims to have achieved a number of incredible deeds before becoming a Lich. Many of these deeds seem implausible in a pre-Fold society, especially for a writer. They include: Inventing the internet, slaying a dragon, creating the popular anime Neon Genesis Evangelion, defeating an alien armada by uploading a virus into their mothership, and "becoming the Hero of Kvatch".


After The Fold, Draxxus, newly Liched, spent several years establishing a number of communities, warbands, enclaves, and principalities in the Northern Ruins. During these years, Draxxus experimented with magic and his new found immortality, traveling the planes and perfecting a number of spells still in use today. By all accounts Draxxus was a capable leader, and quickly adapted his newfound magical abilities to managing his small kingdom. Draxxus was one of the first Post-Fold parties to re-establish wireless communication technology, erecting the first Dark Monolith within one of his enclaves to enable internet and cell phone calls. Draxxus's book states that he did this to reconnect the world, but letters recovered from the Northern Ruins reveal he initially missed playing online video games and had hopes that rebuilding the internet would ease his acquisition of "cool shit".

Draxxus's efforts to stabilize the Northern Ruins were fruitless, however, and he was unable to find a magical power that would restore the land to a habitable region. As the global collapse continued, Draxxus's influence dwindled. Exacerbated by raiding parties from the nearby Electro Demon Horde, Draxxus decided to leave the north and head for Neo-Francisco. It's during this journey he mastered necromancy, summoning his now famous Skeletal Horde.

Arrival in Neo-Francisco

In 2184A, Draxxus arrived on the outskirts of Neo-Francisco's northernmost district, the Old Mountain Holds. Backed by an army of thousands of skeletons, the Old Mountain Holds deployed their defensive forces, which at the time comprised mainly of Halibut Corp's Security R Us(TM) Drones, and Daintree warehouse workers press ganged into militias. Fighting was furious, with many casualties on both sides until Draxxus quelled the battle by announcing, via a sky-projection fireworks display, that he'd only come to the city to get some "Sweet stuff, cool clothes and things like that". Many protested opening the city walls for the Lich, especially after so many had died fighting him, but Draxxus had already brought an incredible amount of capital with him from the wastes, so no one really cared. Once inside the city proper Draxxus paid for a large memorial to the fallen built above NF's northernmost city gate and made a healthy contribution to the Old Mountain Hold's anti-tax communal fund, an act of great charity for the regions most wealthy.

Draxxus almost immediately began plotting to take over the Old Mountain Holds, at one point enacting an elaborate plan to open a timerift in the center of the district, teleporting everyone and everything to a time when one of his plans had succeeded. This plan and others were thwarted by several of the Mountain Hold's gig heroes, most notably Cool Guys Inc, who became something of a nemesis for Draxxus while the Lich worked within the city.

Movement to Neo-Francisco Future

After a particularly public defeat in 2187A, Draxxus vowed to give up villaining and moved to Neo-Francisco Future. The district welcome Draxxus with open arms, and for good reason. The Lich quickly developed his Dark Monolith technology and distributed it throughout the city, leading to a rapid development of mobile communications technology guided by the Graffiti Soul. This development left Draxxus firmly in place as one of the districts most powerful beings. Draxxus would later comment that he "wished he'd thought of that before" and that it was "way easier than summoning dragons and stuff. No one even tried to stop me".

Draxxus quickly took advantage of this new found position to commission the development of Bonr, the primary gig employment hookup app now used by 94% of the population of NF to find love.

Current Events

Draxxus currently resides in "Casa Hueso", an enormous inverted black pyramid just outside the financial sector of Neo-Francisco Future. The pyramid is said to be the focus for a great magical vortex, presumably crafted by Draxxus for some unknown plan of his. Casa Hueso has no known entry point, and entrance is by invitation only. Within the pyramid is said to be an ever shifting space but largely hollow, with wide open spaces, parks, laboratories, skeletal server farms and other facilities suspended in mid-air, floating around the immense internal space of the pyramid. Draxxus himself has a modest apartment in the capstone at the bottom of the pyramid, as seen on "Lifestyles Of The Lich And Famous".

The pyramid utilizes a number of magical protections, as well as an unending horde of semi-intelligent bones assembled in a variety of horrific, hilarious, and heartwarming shapes.